On Friday Mar. 15, the lights were low in Memorial Commons and students were in the mood for Bates College’s favorite musical pastime: the Sex Week A Capella Concert.

Getting the audience loose and ready were the Merimanders, who opened with a handful of amusing and informative sketches depicting healthy consent practices. Euphemisms were laid on thick, as the Meris propositioned each other to “Lady and the Tramp” noodles, to ride ponies and to ice skate.

The Meris then burst into their first number, Bruno Mars’s “Versace on the Floor,” featuring soloists Maya Judge ‘25 and Cece Marshall ‘26. The group was absolutely banging, as smooth harmonies filled the space and left the audience begging for more. At the climax of the song, the Meris shocked the audience, eliciting whoops and applause as they shed their blazers.

Closing out their position of the evening, the all-female group sang Rihanna’s “S&M”, featuring brief solos from each member of the group. With this number, the group paid homage to their Pitch Perfect counterparts, The Barden Bellas, no doubt satisfying the audience with its relevance.

Following the Meris, the Manic Optimists mounted the stage and promptly surrounded two members of their group in a circle of spirit fingers. Though, it seems members were better with their hands than others. As they began their first song, “Pony” by Ginuwine featuring solos by Nathaniel Aronson ‘27 and Dhruv Chandra ‘25, the group dispersed, revealing two members in a rather promiscuous position.

The performance was shocking, to say the least. The ManOps can only be described as Magic Mike wannabes as their gyrating hips and body rolls pervaded the song’s choreography. At the song’s finale, the two soloists tore away their pants, inspiring many cheers and laughs from the audience.

Before their second song, Kelly McKaige ‘26 entered the spotlight to inform the audience about STI awareness and testing through the magic of song. Other members of the group then proceeded to perform a sketch about STI testing and prevention, which was reminiscent of a high school health class assignment.

Returning to their musical charge, the group performed “Bang Bang” by Jessie J, Ariana Grande and Nicki Minaj, with solos by Tristan Seavey ‘26, Tyler Stearns ‘26 and Adam Joseph ‘25. Though some high notes seemed rather ambitious for members of the group, the number was brimming with energy and was a blast to watch.

Next up was the Crosstones, performing “Jaguar” by Victoria Monét with Gabriela Ruberto ‘25 soloing. Ruberto killed the solo and the group supported her with gusto. Their number was embellished with a giant inflatable penis who grooved in the back. Though their mascot had some completely normal inflation issues at the beginning, they still killed their performance.

Next, the group discussed relationships and open communication with the audience in a lighthearted dialogue.

The group closed their performance with “Mercy” by Duffy, featuring soloist Ana Fowler ‘24. Fowler absolutely bodied her solo, with impressive musical runs and a notable power in her voice. Though overall the Crosstones were not as lewd as other groups, they still put on an impressive show.

TakeNote followed the Crosstones with their version of “telepatía” by Kali Uchis, with a solo by Mazie Chamberlin ‘27. The song was very fun, but there was something slightly stiff about the performance that I felt didn’t fully take advantage of their soloists talent.

The group succeeded their first number with a brief dialogue about sexuality, featuring an amusing anecdote about Smokey the Bear.

TakeNote’s second song was a mashup of “Maneater” by Daryl Hall & John Oates and “Maneater” by Nelly Furtado, featuring solos by Samantha Gabel ‘26 and Caitlin Haggerty ‘24. The mashup was clever and super smooth, resulting in a strong finish from the group.

The Deansmen were the final group to take the stage, starting out with a mashup of “Bye, Bye, Bye” by ‘NSYNC and “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back)” by Backstreet Boys, featuring soloists John Campana ‘26 and David Walker ‘24. While undoubtedly fun and entertaining, I felt there was some power or sound missing from the vocals; there was some empty resonance in the arrangement that needed to be addressed. However, the group still had the audience clapping along and “wooing” in sync with the rest of them.

The group followed their first number with a handful of hilarious poems about sex positivity. Limericks and haikus galore, the group did a wonderful job in making sex education fun!

The concert’s happy ending was the Deansmen’s rendition of “Stacy’s Mom” by Fountains Of Wayne featuring Ted Leamon ‘27 and Shelby Armor ’24. The audience was grooving and singing along with the group, taking great pleasure in the group’s performance. Somewhere in the middle there was a strange interpolation before the group continued the song which left me somewhat confused.

Overall, each group added something special, fun and sexy to this year’s concert. A great way to finish off sex week, I couldn’t help but hope for an encore.