Caffeinated Coffee Criticism


It’s always been a dream of mine to have my own café where I can make my own coffee and talk with my customers about the difference in the flavor profiles of Ethiopian and Central American coffee. Unfortunately, I don’t really know coffee like that, so I figured I’d start with a review of common coffee. I tried them all. The order I have them in this review is the order I drank them in, so I must say I did get pretty wired by the end. Please enjoy. 

Hazelnut – this contains nuts but it also contains a delicious aroma and taste. This here is a safe option, not too strong, but it definitely has some kick. Personally my go to option before and during my 8:00 a.m. class.

Jamaican Me Crazy – if you are a fan of bitter things you will love this coffee. Straight from the smell you can notice the earthy tones in it. Definitely a sip by sip coffee and each sip has immense flavor.

World Blend – I taste nothing and I smell nothing. This just tastes like dunkin coffee, very low tier Commons coffee that brings nothing to the breakfast table. Despicable.

At this point I am starting to jitter and my eyelids are twitching. Also feeling way better and energized. More confident as a whole. 

French vanilla – dang this is a good coffee. I was hooked straight from the aroma of vanilla, this coffee is exactly what it promises to be. Not as bitter as Jamaican Me Crazy but much more of a flavor pallet than world blend. This coffee is so good. If you love vanilla this is goated.

Spring blend – I fucking love this coffee. Smell: you’re in the woods on a warm day it just rained and you smell the tree bark and you’re at peace. It tastes almost like the bitterness of Jamaican Me Crazy, but a chocolatey after-taste. So good so good so good.